Chapter Six
After she left. Lucy spoke up "You know guys I can't go alone."
"You won't be alone for long though Lucy."
"I guess so. It's going to be so hard."
"Don't worry. We will always be here for you right boys?"
"Right!" Taylor and Zac chimed in.
Taylor said "Oh Lucy don't worry about the kitchen we'll clean it up."
"Oh I totally forgot about that. I probably don't have glasses left"
"Well actually you have two."
Lucy sighed "oh well."
"By the way Lucy why do you have an ashtray and why is it full?" Lucy stood up instantly and was completely speechless.
"I...I.. dunno."
"Lucy you smoke?" Ike asked her rather worriedly.
"Only when I'm upset. I only smoked one or two. Are you mad at me?" Lucy felt bad because she knew it was only half-true.
"No don't worry about it nobody's perfect."
Zac started dragging all the bags up to Lucy's room and put out three sleeping bags out for the boys. Taylor cleaned the kitchen while Ike cooked up some ravioli's. Which smelled very good.
It's going to be so hard going home under these circumstances, but Grandma would want me there. I have to write a poem for her. Mom wanted me to but I have to. Lucy thought to herself and decided to get up and fetch some paper from the other room. She sat back down and began writing titling the poem Flower in the Sky.
On that very day the very day I lost her
I lost her to the sky
She was a flower to all that knew her
Always spreading her love
In the beds of wild flowers I see you
see you down under the other flowers
Trying to not to be bother
So small and timid but I still see you
I knew that that inevitable day would come
I feared it, I wished it away
But I knew one day it would come along
And take you away
What do I say know that your gone?
Nothing because I don't need to
Your watching me from up above
You know I will always love you
"Hey Luce whatcha writing?"
"Oh Zac you startled me!"
"Oh I'm sorry."
"It's alright. OH it's a poem for my grandmother. My mother loves my poetry and wanted me to write one for her."
"You write poetry? I never knew that."
"Well I write it my poem book it's like my diary but instead I write poems instead of entries." Zac's eyes light up.
"I see! Can I read it?"
"Sure go ahead." A few moments later a very surprised Zac looked up. "I never knew you had such talent Lucy."
"Thanks. But it was a just a few quick idea's I put on paper."
"Well then it's pretty darn good then!"
"Thanks. Maybe I'll let you see a few more if your good." Lucy started to twiddle her thumbs together
Oh please!"
"Oh c'mon they are upstairs but only the ones I let you read no peeking at other pages."
"Oh ok." Zac followed Lucy up the stairs and into her room. Lucy revealed her poem book underneath her nightstand.
"Now don't you tell the others where I hid it okay? Hey you did a good job cleaning in here thanks pally poo."
"Oh shoot don't get all mushy on me now."
"Why not your my Zakky poo right?"
"I guess so"
"You guess so? I don't think so" Before Zac could react Lucy grabbed and threw him on the bed. Then she handed him her poem book which was hand decorated with scribbles by Lucy.
"Okie here's one I wrote when I was really upset but you can read it:"
April 24, 1996
Dumb
Killing time for the hell of it,
No point in arguing anymore,
Your always wrong,
I'm just so dumb and I will never change,
Annoying the shit outta everyone,
Staring down people you can never meet,
Speaking words I don't understand,
Handling things outta my reach,
I'm just so dumb I cant get it right,
Can't understand life or myself,
My restive feelings that refuse to calm down,
I just cant think,
Whatever I hear, I hear it wrong,
My friends playing with my head,
What's comes along goes around I tell myself,
I'm just so dumb I cant lie,
Aching from the pain,
Sleepy from the nightmares,
Tired from it all; Upset at life,
I'm just so dumb, I cant do it right.